Don’t Give Up!
If all you needed was one person in the world to tell you not to, then I will. Please don’t do it. You do have value. You are priceless in fact. I don’t care about your sex, your race, your nationality, your religion, or your sexual orientation. Nothing in your life or lack thereof is worth this ultimate decision. Fight it! If you have failed at something: Suicide is not the answer. If you have lost all of your material possessions: Suicide is not the answer. If everyone you know has turned their backs on you: Suicide is still not the answer. If you are full of self-hatred, and all of those that you encounter only confirm your thoughts: Don’t give up. I haven’t. If I can keep on living, anyone can.
Face My Giant
I have battled with thoughts of suicide for years. Heck, not even just thoughts, an actual attempt when I was younger. I am going to share one of the many reasons that suicide has plagued my mind. If you have ever felt this way, I hear you.
Not Good Enough – Not Normal
I was born with a birth defect. When I was growing up, I was told about it by cruel observers. Like I never owned a mirror, or saw one in passing. It made me feel small. When I looked people in the face and spilled my heart, I felt like everything I said was cancelled out by IT. As loud or as hard as I screamed, IT was brought to my attention. Everything was irrelevant because of IT. I knew that nothing I said was ever important. Everything that I was or that I said was reduced to nothing more than IT. That is all that I ever was. Period. It absolutely shattered my heart into a million pieces. Then I entertained fear.
I have told God that I was a mistake. I have asked him to make it so that I was never even born. I have asked him to delete me. He won’t. You know why?
Psalms 139:14 – You were wonderfully made
Isaiah 49 – God has engraved your name on the palm of his hands
Jeremiah 29 – God has plans to give you hope and a future
I have heard people say that if you commit suicide, you go straight to hell. I have never found that scripture. I DO NOT IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM CONDONE SUICIDE. PLEASE IF YOU ARE FEELING LOST, REACH OUT FOR HELP.
I wonder if God kept silent on this issue for a reason. Maybe for the grieving family’s sake? Maybe so in moments of weakness people didn’t rely on God’s goodness to take their life? (http://www.bible.com/bibleanswers_result.php?id=228). I DO NOT KNOW.
One pastor I heard said that IN HIS PERSONAL OPINION, he didn’t think God would send someone to hell that had a mental sickness anymore than he would send someone for having a broken leg. I WILL NOT PRETEND TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS. I DO NOT. Chose Life!
Suicide is NOT the Answer
As a child, one online stranger answered my desperate plea. I was in an online chat room. They simply said don’t give up. Find love, find peace, and find happiness. I have never forgotten that. It was like a challenge for a better life. Like an epic journey with purpose. It was confirmation that there was good out there. Good in the world for me. Some people have it better than us. Some people have it worse than us. As long as you are still breathing, there is good for you too. There are people waiting to hear about all that you have overcome, so that they can beat their giant as well. They wait to see all that you have to offer. You have greatness in you that no one else has. Please Don’t Give Up!
If you are considering suicide right now:
- There are several organizations you can call for help:
- Do an internet search. There are different hotlines available to different countries.
- US-National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
- Reach out! Someone Cares! I do!